A Coalition Against Sexual Assault

The Importance of Education

2010-08-31T14:29:00.000-07:00

As the school year begins, let us take a moment to think about the importance of education. Education is present all over our society. Without a good education, it is harder to succeed in life. What does this good education include? In school students learn how to count, how to read, and many other important lessons. What about the lessons most applicable to real life? Most children are taught very young about the importance of “Stranger Danger.” Ask any child over 7, and most will tell you that they are not allowed to talk to strangers. Stranger Danger is a good lesson to teach our children. However, it is not the most valuable. As mentioned in previous blogs, most sexual violence is committed by someone that the victim knows, and this is especially true with children (see our blog about grooming techniques used by perpetrators). So the question remains: if sexual violence is a major issue in our society, and our children continue to be victimized, why is there not more education about sexual violence in school?

Sexual violence education is NOT sex ed. The lack of knowledge about program content creates a lot of hurdles with the school administrators. Administrators are reluctant to even return a phone call if the word sexual is mentioned at all. When approaching new schools about starting our Personal Body Safety program, our educator has seen the look of disgust that shows on the administrator’s face. “That’s an issue to be discussed at home.” “I don’t want to open up that can of worms.” What do these comments tell us? Sexual violence education is not a priority in the schools, and that needs to change. Yes, this is an issue that should ALSO be discussed at home. But what if it is not happening? What if the violence is occurring AT home? The perpetrators do not want their victims to hear that it is wrong and the child can say No and get help. And that is exactly why the education has to be included at the schools. Sexual violence education should be as easily included in the curriculum as any other safety or awareness campaign.

Yes, sometimes tough issues are hard to talk about. But by keeping sexual violence shrouded in silence, it perpetuates the secrecy surrounding the violence itself. We must break that silence and make sexual violence an issue that people DO discuss. Without discussion, how can we teach our children the skills they need to help prevent it? Without prevention, the violence will only continue. No one wants to learn that their child has been a victim. So let us empower them through education and teach them that they have a voice. We just have to help them find it.

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month

2010-03-16T13:51:00.000-07:00

Since April of every year is designated as Sexual Assault Awareness Month, we felt it would be appropriate to post some statistics regarding sexual assault to help raise awareness of these staggering numbers. The following statistics were published by the Illinois Coalition Against Sexual Assault in By the Numbers: Sexual Violence Statistics.
Sexual assault is non-consensual sexual contact. Women and men of all ages, as well as children, can be victimized by sexual assault. A rapist may be a stranger, an acquaintance or a relative of a victim.
There is no boundary for who might be raped. Almost 18%, or 17.7 million women, in the United States have been victims of rape or attempted rape sometime in their lives. Of the 12.1 million who have been raped, 39%, or 4.7 million women, were raped more than once.
Victims of sexual assault might take years to recover from the physical and psychological effects caused by the rape. Victims may suffer from post traumatic stress disorder. Victims often experience a sense of shame, humiliation and self-blame, which may lead them to keep rape a secret.
Below are some interesting data regarding sexual assault in the state of Illinois.

• Adult child abusers have 10 times more victims than offenders who rape adults. Child abusers have an average of 76 victims; a rapist has an average of seven.
• According to recent data from the U.S. Justice Department, there were no significant differences in the rate of rape/sexual assault among racial groups.
• Persons with disabilities are at 1.5 to 5 times the risk of sexual abuse and assault as are members of the general population.
• 61% of rape victims were sexually assaulted before the age of 18.
• 90% of rape victims under age 13 knew their attacker.
• One third of rape victims have seriously considered suicide, and 13% actually attempt it.
• 25% of incest survivors become pregnant as a result of the incest.
• 74% of women who excessively use alcohol experience sexual abuse.
• 50% of women treated for substance abuse were sexually abused as children.
• Most men who sexually abuse boys define their sexual orientation as heterosexual.
• 66% of all prostitutes are victims of child sexual abuse; 2/3 of these are sexually abused by fathers, stepfathers, or foster fathers.
• 40% of child sexual abuse victims seek mental health treatment after reaching adulthood.
• Psychological effects of child sexual abuse often last into adulthood. Adult survivors of child sexual abuse may exhibit depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, dissociation, and low self-esteem.
• Emotional and behavioral symptoms exhibited by adult survivors of child sexual abuse can include: major depression, adjustment disorder, alcohol or other substance abuse, personality disorders, multiple personality disorder and psychosexual dysfunctions.
• Ritual abuse is often initiated by family members who abuse their own children. These abusers may have been abused children themselves.
• More than 70% of rape or sexual assault victims knew their attackers, compared to about half of all violent crime victims.

Unfortunately, these are the facts. Hopefully, with heightened awareness of sexual assault, we can eradicate the problem by not avoiding the issues.

Keeping Children Safe

2010-01-22T09:34:00.000-08:00

The occurrence of sexual abuse among children is more prevalent than many suspect. Unfortunately, most children know their offender(s) and often times are related to them. Considering all the myths surrounding child sexual assault, many studies have shown that social class does not factor in the risk for child sexual abuse.

Northwest CASA would like to share the following information published by the King County Sexual Assault Resource Center in Renton, Washington.

HOW TO IDENTIFY GROOMING TACTICS AND PREVENT SEXUAL ASSAULT
Parents and caregivers are the number one resource to protect children and prevent sexual assault. The majority of sexual assaults are not random incidents. Nine out of ten children who came to King County Sexual Assault Resource Center (KCSARC) last year knew their abuser; a family member victimized almost half of those children.

Before assaults occur—especially those committed by someone known to the victim—offenders “groom” victims and families to gain their trust and confidence. This grooming process is a critical time for parents and caregivers to identify the potential risks to children.

1. Understand the grooming process used by offenders. The basic steps are:
• Gaining the trust and confidence of future victims and their families
• Introducing the child to sexual types of touch, with escalating inappropriate behavior
• Manipulating children with trickery or threats to keep the assault secret

2. Know who your child spends time with, and watch for warning signs that grooming is taking place, It is important to look for patterns of behavior involving several of the characteristics below. A potential offender may be someone who:
• Is exceptionally charming and/or helpful
• Attempts to obtain immediate “insider” status
• Consistently prefers the company of children to adults, rather than looking for age-appropriate companionship
• Attempts to establish peer relationships with people much younger than themselves
• Fails to honor clear boundaries set by parents
• Roughhouses, wrestles or tickles children after being asked to stop

3. If you think a child is being groomed, trust your “gut feeling” and act on it:
• Listen for statements or questions from your child that would support your suspicions
• Encourage our child to tell you more about the time he or she spends with the person
• Assert yourself and end questionable behavior
• Be willing to stop all contact between your child and the potential abuser, even if it makes you the “bad guy”

4. Give your child the prevention tools to help identify inappropriate behavior:
• Explain your words and actions to your child as a personal safety skill
• Talk regularly with children about safety skills and help them become more aware of their environment
• Make sure children understand that they can and should say “NO!” to anyone who makes them feel uncomfortable

Resources are available such as books, that parents can read to their children to prompt discussions. “My Body is Mine, My Feelings are Mine” by Susan Hoke is one that contains an adult guide book in it to assist parents. We hope this informative outline helps you to recognize potential dangerous situations. Keeping our children safe is always a number one priority!

Sexual Assault and the Priviledged Perpetrator

2009-11-30T12:11:00.000-08:00

Over the years many of us have come into contact with media coverage highlighting a perpetrator of sexual assault or abuse who appears to be entitled. By privilege we mean “a right or immunity granted as an advantage or favor especially to some and not others”. The groups in this case are the rich and/or famous and the benefits are defined simply as avoiding the consequences distributed to the average citizen by the judicial system.

Some famous cases include Bill Clinton, William Kennedy Smith, Mike Tyson, Oscar De La Hoya, Kobe Bryant, and the Archdiocese of Boston. The list goes on and on. Why should someone with power and status in society get a free walk? Some people may be thinking that some of these people were proven innocent. While we were not there to find out exactly what happened, we can all agree that people in positions of power have always had wiggle room within the law.

In last month’s post we briefly talked about blaming the victim, and how often it happens in our society. How much more berated and ridiculed do you think a survivor will be if their perpetrator has a perceived status in our society? One of the first things people will say is that the survivor is lying just to get money or attention. What about justice? Doesn’t that survivor deserve just as much of a fair trial as the victim of any other crime? Society’s view of the perpetrator should not have any influence on the outcome of the conviction.

What kind of judging goes on in your mind? Does a person with a so called “clean” image get passed over? How about the public apology?

Rape Is NOT...

2009-09-30T10:22:00.000-07:00

RAPE IS ABOUT UNCONTROLABLE SEXUAL AROUSAL! WOMEN SAY THEY ARE RAPED TO GET REVENGE! These are just a few of the myths surrounding the topic of rape and sexual assault in our society today. We decided for this month’s post we would concentrate on dispelling a few major myths that pollute the mind of so many people.

The first myth we would like to discuss is the one that sounds like this, “Sexual assault is about sexual desire; the perpetrator is unable to control their sexual urges.” This myth also perpetuates the victim- blaming aspect of sexual assault because it can lead some people to believe that the victim somehow provoked or aroused the perpetrator. Sexual assault is, in fact, an act of power and control. It’s not about the person who can’t control themselves and needs to have sex right now; sexual assault is NOT about that uncontrollable sexual desire. Sexual assault does not occur because someone doesn’t have someone else who is willing to have sex with them. On the contrary, most perpetrators do have a consensual sexual partner, such as a girlfriend or wife. Sexual assault, instead, is about wanting to control, degrade, or humiliate the victim. We also know that this act is not spontaneous, as over 80% of sexual assaults are planned in advance.

Another myth that warrants consideration is that women falsely accuse men of rape for personal gain or use it to get even with their partners. This myth is not limited to your average citizen. In our crisis intervention work experience, we have frequently noticed that police treat a victim as if she/he were lying. In extreme cases, police will charge the victim for making a false report. A statistic supporting the opposition of the myth is that only 2% of all reported sexual assaults are false. Our society has a very negative view of sexual assault victims, and the majority of people are not going to lie about being sexually assaulted. The clarification of this myth can remind us to always believe someone who tells us that they are a victim of sexual violence.

So let’s start talking about these subjects and get the ball rolling. When this conversation becomes more comfortable, the issue will no longer be taboo, and these myths will be replaced by facts.

Thought for the Week

2009-03-27T09:03:00.000-07:00

In 1989 a young woman in Colorado was raped and while she recovered in the intensive care unit a debate raged in the local media as to why she wasn’t wearing underwear under her pantyhose and whether this meant that she had invited the attack.

In 1991 a young woman was forced at gun point to perform oral sex on her date who then raped her vaginally and anally. Her date had locked her in his bedroom but she was able to call the police after he fell asleep. They found her hiding in a closet, recovered the gun and arrested her assailant. At the preliminary hearing the judge ruled that because the woman went willingly to a party at the defendant’s house prior to the attack there was not enough evidence to establish that the defendant forced her to engage in these acts against her will. The case was dropped. The defendant had been arrested three times previously for the same charges against different women. All of those cases had been dropped by the same judge for similar reasons.

In 1992 a jury found Mike Tyson guilty of criminal sexual assault. He was sentenced to eighteen months in prison even though the sentencing guidelines required him to serve six to thirty years. Shortly after his release, a mere eleven months later, Miller Beer hired him as a spokesperson.

In 1999 a 13 year old girl was brutally gang raped by three older boys in an abandoned shed. A fourth boy who stood as “look out” told the police that the boys had sex with her after she had passed out from drinking too much alcohol. The police found her in the shed naked and unconscious, covered in blood, vomit and urine. The detectives didn’t want to press charges because earlier in the evening she had told her girlfriend that she “wanted to get some”.

Last Monday three boys aged 8 and 9 years old were charged with raping an 11 year old girl. The father of one of the boys said that the girl had wanted to have sex with the boys and that she only said it was rape because she didn’t want to get in trouble with her parents.

I was a criminal prosecutor in Chicago for many years and focused on sex crimes. I was also a rape crisis counselor. I have heard many horrible stories, but nothing shocks me more than society’s response to sexual assault victims and its ignorance as to depth and extent of the issues created in the wake of sexual assault. Even as a prosecutor I felt impotent to make any real change. Those in law enforcement who dealt often with rapists and their victims held firmly to archaic beliefs; beliefs that made it impossible to effectively help the survivors or prosecute their attackers.

Sexual assault is incredibly widespread but it is also horribly misunderstood. In the United States, 683,000 women and girls are raped each year. That means 1.3 are raped per minute, 78 per hour, 1,871 per day. To compare, the American Cancer Society estimates that approximately 202,044 American women are diagnosed with breast cancer and 40,200 women die from breast cancer each year. Therefore, we are far more likely to know someone who has survived a sexual assault than breast cancer.

Fighting breast cancer has become a daily event in our lives. Pink ribbons adorn everything from cans of soup to cashmere sweaters reminding us to support to the cause. This is the proper response to something that so tragically impacts our mothers, wives, sisters and daughters. Why then is sexual assault, which impacts so many more women and children, such a silent epidemic? The answer lies somewhere in our society’s views on rape and sexual abuse.

It is my hope that this blog will provide comfort and information to those who seek and need it. I hope that by being informed and talking about sexual assault issues that we can find out and then change why the treatment and prevention of sexual assault is not addressed more aggressively; why individuals either blame the victims for their own sexual assault or don’t believe them at all; why survivors can’t or won’t get the help and support they require. It is my hope that our coalition on this blog will help find the answers to these and other such questions and that we can then educate our community about the true nature of sexual assault. It is my hope this blog will help to make our community a safer place for women and children.

Sexual Assault Q & A

2009-03-27T09:02:00.000-07:00

Please post any type of question you have about sexual assault or dating violence. Your questions may be medical, legal, factual or emotional and will be answered by our expert and experienced staff.